A line of fat computer books I plan to write...
...with very wide margins and no code examples before page 200.
Don't forget the screen-dumps of each page of the wizards that are designed for people who don't read books about how to use their software.
- but those screen-dump pages are very useful for those who read the books but do not have a computer!
True! I'm reading an online version of Inside CeeSharp
but I haven't gotten around to installing DotNet
yet. I'm getting a lot out of the screen dumps. But then, Inside C#
seems to be a bit better than the average bible. -- AndrewQueisser
I agree with you absolutely about the 8-inch thick TeachYourselfInSevenDaysUnleashed books. However, as a big AnimalBook fan, I have to say that "InaNutshell?" really doesn't fit in there.
The great thing about AnimalBook
s is you don't have to read them. -- PhlIp
I'm planning to write Enterprise Network Security With C and XML In 30 Seconds for the Brain Dead
when I get a chance:
Enterprise Network Security With C and XML in 30 Seconds for the Brain Dead
Who is this book for?
For almost anyone who is afraid of viruses, trojans, greeks, or lefthanded satanistic poodle pruners who want your data. For those cipherpunks who know that The Man
is out to get 'em. For those who realize that masking their identity when they buy dog food online is imperative to democracy and freedom as we know it.
Now, the author recognizes that people vary in skills. Consequently, the steps increase in skill level as they progress. The skill level is neatly placed in the margin next to each step.
[BEGINNER] Step 1. Turn off your computer
If you don't know how to do this, you can yank out the power plug from the wall. If you don't know how to do this, just stop paying your electric bills. NOTE: If you take this latter approach, this will take longer than 30 seconds.
Once the computer is off, you're 80% of the way there. The computer is secure from all but the most insidious of blackbag attacks. Anything beyond this step requires an advanced knowledge of computers. (And some biceps. Eat your wheaties!)
[ADVANCED] Step 2. Smash monitor, case, hard drive, ethernet cable and (why not?) mouse with C and XML 1000-page doorstops, er, textbooks.
Now the computer is completely secure from all attacks.
[GURU] Step 3. Go outside, away from computers. Become a lumberjack or something.
Why are you still reading this? You're supposed to be outside. Some guru you are. Can't even read.
XML Enterprise Object Network Services 101 with UML in Seven Days for Dummies Super-Bible Unleashed
If he is my competition, them I'm fscked! (Well, actually non-fscked in this case.)
Judging from the cover, this would be an in-depth treatise on CouplingAndCohesion
. ;) Given the typical programmer demographic (young males), these ought to sell like hotcakes!
See also: MrBunny TeachYourselfProgrammingInTenYears
I like this long name. It's funny take-off on the names of computer programming books and how the books all blend together in one's mind.
Yes. In this case, the long name is part of the point of the page. Leave it be?
Foo-oriented programming fell out of style; Bar is the New Thing. But all you have to do substitute "Foo" with "Bar" and pay 3rd-world workers to rewrite the code examples in Bar and put silhouette-leafy intersecting spirals on the cover (or is that so 2011 already?)
The "Dummies" series spawned a trend in books allegedly catering to the ever stupider. Let's extrapolate to see where the trend is heading:
- Flexible Security Architecture for Dummy's
- Flexible Security Architecture for Complete Idiots
- Flexible Security Architecture for The Brain-Dead & Comatose
- Flexible Security Architecture for Invertebrates
- Flexible Security Architecture for Stoned Invertebrates
- Flexible Security Architecture for Republicans (just had to slip that in :-)
- Flexible Security Architecture for Amoebas
- Flexible Security Architecture for Paralyzed Amoebas
- Flexible Security Architecture for Paralyzed Amoebas with Dyslexia
- Flexible Security Architecture for Prions
- Flexible Security Architecture for Abiotic Pond Scum
- Flexible Security Architecture for Fossilized Abiotic Pond Scum
- Flexible Security Architecture for Fossilized Abiotic Pond Scum After Its Star Has Gone Supernova
I'm writing a book on how to conduct an OfficialCertifiedDoubleBlindPeerReviewedPublishedStudy
. It will be called "How to Conduct an Official Certified Double-Blind Peer-Reviewed Published Study in Seven Days for Dummies In a Nutshell Super-Bible Unleashed"
. The publisher was happy because they didn't have to find a picture for the front cover because the title took up all the space.
I guess this is one of the longest page titles on WikiWiki
. Is this the longest page title ever? What is the maximum limit allowed?
Look it up in TitleSizeAndRelevancyManagementForCuriousNewbiesIn7DaysWithXMLandJquery
This page must be left as it is, as it is one of the funniest pages about programming on the web.
Is there an OfficialCertifiedDoubleBlindPeerReviewedPublishedStudy
that the title FooOneOhOneInSevenDaysForDummiesInaNutshellSuperBibleUnleashed
Gotta keep up: "Build a NoSQL Multi-Shard Vertically Integrated Stack with a RESTfull Rails Driven In-Memory Virtual Multi-parallel JPython-Enabled Solution in 7 Days While Snacking Underwater with Big-Breasted Babes" [Partly ripped from slashdot]
(PS: Don't mistake the last "with" for "on".)
New series for the impatient crowd:
"Learn Ruby & Java While Being Shot Out of a Cannon for Complete Over-Caffeinated Morons"